Groundworkers, 20 rules to live or die by.

Over 25 years ago i decided that my woking life needed a change in direction. Building houses on Green and Brownfield sites just wasn't doing it for me anymore.

I decided to become a general builder for a local gas fitting/plumbing/electrical installations company. It was a good move, my earnings escalated and my quality time became more regular.

Over the next 17 years i moved from Builder to builder/supervisor, then to supervisor and finally seven years as a contracts manager. Some of the last few years were difficult, as a large energy supplier brought the company out and basically ruined it.

In 2016 i was finally made redundant as the business was mothballed by the energy company that owned us.

I spent the next 12 months working for myself as a gas fitter. Taking a quote from a very famous movie "it's no country for old men" i found it difficult to make a good living.

In the years i had been absent from the groundworkers scene, the pay had increased rapidly. I therefore decided to dip my toes in the murky waters of new-build homes, as a groundworker once again.

It didn't take me long to realise that these guys now lived by some fairly harsh and unforgiving unwritten rules. There is no keeper of said rules, there is just a vast and not exhaustive number of men who live by them.
I have done my best to catalogue these rules and present them for your perusal.

THE RULES

Rule #1 Obey the rules.

Rule #2 Lead by example. (It is forbidden for someone familiar with The Rules to knowingly assist another person to breach them)

Rule #3 Give guidance to the uninitiated. (No matter how good you think your reason is to knowingly breach The Rules, it is never good enough.)

Rule #4 Everything you do at work is about being an animal. (It is, absolutely, without question, unequivocally, about the animalism. Anyone who says otherwise is obviously a fuckwit.)

Rule #5 Toughen the Fuck up! (under no circumstances should you ever show weakness)

Rule #6 Free your mind and the animalism will beggin. (Your mind is your worst enemy. Do all your thinking before you start work in the morning.  Once the van doors open, wrap yourself in the sensations of the site – the smell of the air, the sound of the dumpers, the feeling diesel fumes wafting through your nostrils.)

Rule #7 Talking about ones recent sexual exploits should occur before a shift begins.

Rule #8 Under no circumstances should one show interest in the days work ahead. (Anyone showing enthusiasm in the projects at hand will be called a cunt many many times)

Rule #9 Facial hair is expected, and must be suitably longer and scruffier by the end of the week.

Rule #10 All conversations should be constructed with sentences carrying an expletive every other word. (It is totally unacceptable to put a sentence together without expletives)

Rule #11 Nothing and i mean Nothing should make you emotional NOTHING! ( if you find yourself welling up at the E.T movie, refer yourself to rule #5)

Rule #12 if anyone of authority asks you where something is, you must reply with "i haven't seen it for ages".

Rule #13 Rain and inclement weather are not to be hidden from. Under no circumstances should you raise a brolly while working on site.

Rule #14 Eat as much processed food as you can stomach. Never ever refuse a chance to order greasy food from a cafe.

Rule #15 When things get tough during the day, go home and turn to the bottle. (do not drink wine, or any other light beverage, Whisky, beer and other non select hard beverages are acceptable)

Rule #17 It is considered a great offence to show any amount of your cultured upbringing whilest sat in the canteen. Pay particular attention to what newspaper you read, the Times would be considered a great insult to onlookers.

Rule #18 If driving a white van, one must drive aggressively and with no consideration for other road users. (if a passenger it is expected that you would offer words of encouragement to driver when performing cut ups and two fingered hand signals)

Rule #19 Young new members of the team should have their sex lives talked about repeatedly during break times. The more explicit their responses the more they are accepted. (If youngster is not capable of talking dirty they are referred to rule #5)

Rule #20 Treat women as objects when talking among your workmates. (Attitude towards women is that they have no feelings and are merely sexual objects, they deserve no respect and should be used and abused)

These are the top 20 rules i have observed thus far, there are far more yet to be documented.

It's a tough life being a builder on these sites, my hat is doffed to all who are tough enough to get through each week, and for all those that find it hard and are just about hanging in there.....refer yourself to rule #5!

Cycling my way to a good state of health.

I have recently taken to the sport of road cycling. It was in July 2014 that i took the leap and purchased a bike that had tyres so thin that they looked like they might explode when i got on it. And let me mention the saddle, it could have easily been lost in my arse crack with only an expedition of Sherpas able to find it. But still i had doled out £200 for it and i sure as hell was going to give it a go.

The whole cycling thing was inspired by one of my old mates who had posted on facebook that he had purchased an old racer for £30. Well my purchase was a bit more expensive but essentially it was two wheels and a bunch of gears.

Early winter of 2014 i had been out for a ride on my bike. My son Simon was a keen cyclist and accompanied me on many rides. This particular time i was alone and flying down Brownhills high street at a terminal velocity. Out of the local chippy stepped Mick, they guy who brought the £30 bike. As i passed him i shouted him MICK!! Well after he caught his bag of chips when almost jumping out of his skin he raised an arm.

About a week later i decided to pop him a message on facebook to say it was me who put the fear of god into him. He was surprised and listened when i told him it was he who inspired me. we have been close friends and cycling companions since that day.

Simon and me had talked about trying to get a few people together for a ride each Sunday, which i thought was a great idea. I put a post up on facebook asking if anyone wanted to meet at the top oak Brownhills and go for a boxing day ride around the local villages. Well the day came and just me and Simon ended up on the ride. We did about 15 miles that day and vowed to keep it up. Well the next Sunday Mick turned up, then the next Mick and Chris (Simons brother in law) turned up. 

I rode from my moms house (where we were living while waiting to move to our new house) to Bridgenorth on new years day. It was 64 miles and very quiet, in fact it was peaceful. i enjoyed it and have ever since had a taste for long distance cycling. 

The crowd that now turn up are up to 20 strong, though i think 11 is our most in one go. we have our own team kit and look fairly well organised.

I have completed a 100 mile ride in March, and so has my good wife Julie who has took to the sport admirably. She climbs hills like a mountain goat, and don't do too bad on the flat either. 

Our little group are called Shire Oak Leisure Riders, we really do take leisurely rides....most of the time. Occasionally i think i am 18 again and like to visit the man with the hammer (cycling chat for when you go to the hurt locker). i go find a hill and blast up it until i feel sick and weak to the point of collapse. There's something taking yourself to the limits that cleanses the soul.

Anyway, i intend to cycle for a long time to come. At present i am about to go watch the tour of Britain in Burnley. Then a couple of days riding in that area, may be a couple of hills as well. Then in October we will be going to Majorca for a week of cycling on hired carbon bikes. i will report back on that presently.

separation from slimming world.

I finally reached my target weight at slimming world, and took the decision to end my subscription.

It's been a journey that has taken me 16 months in which i have lost 8st 6lb.

I made many friends a SW and enjoyed every minute of it. I actually got a buzz from loosing the weight. I wish everyone who attends the very best of luck for the future.

Well as for me, i am seriously into my cycling now i can sit on a road bike and enjoy watching me go by the world.

I have helped some friends set up a cycle group which is getting stronger all of the time.

Julie, my beautiful wife has taken to road biking which suits me fine as i get great company on long rides.

More posts to follow, take care all.

A year in the life of a man at slimming world.

It's been a little over a year since i joined slimming world.
At the time i weighed in at 22st 6lb, having weighed 23st 13lb the previous month. i blogged about this here if you haven't already read it.
The journey to my target has been fairly smooth, with the odd speed bump along the way. I did however see all the speed bumps coming, which made them easier to negotiate.

During the year i have had Three different consultants, one of which (Madie) was temporary. Our groups latest consultant Rachel is a credit to SW, and a credit to herself.

My year started with me rocking up to the group vouchers in hand, and a head full of ideas and ambition. I had loosely followed SW plan before joining, hence the drop from 23st 13lb to 22st 6lb. It was a conscious decision i made to stay at group as often as possible, this is something i do not regret. It is in my opinion the people who stay behind who will be most successful, even when a bad week has been had.

I blogged a post about men at slimming world here. I feel sincerely that is is easier for men to lose weight than women. My hat goes off to women who lose weight and keep it off. Women are subject to more peer pressure than men, they also have more uncontrollable influences upon them than men. For instance, Women are often expected to look after the family (children and husbands), regardless of if they hold down a full time job or not. Providing family with SW friendly food can be difficult as children often want and need high calorific value food (well they are growing). Husbands don't usually mind if they become a little overweight, it's not such of a stigma for men is it? A nice juicy steak and chips with fried onion rings goes down well after a day at work for a man, doesn't it? My point being that presenting hubby with a plate of tomato cuscus and the finest selection of salad isn't going to be appreciated quite the same as a steaming hot pie and chips is it? With the kids, we often find they ask for food then leave most of it on the plate (uncontrollable). It's a major temptation to eat that food rather than bin it. Binning the food is like throwing money down the drain, not easy when budgets are tight i know. The only way to beat this is to become focused on your short or long term goals.

The middle section of my year was probably the easiest time i had for losing weight. Without much effort i could shed 2.5lb per week. I was also finding it easier to exercise and stay focused. Its always a boost when people around you are beginning to notice your weight loss, the comments received acted as a spur to drive one on.
Below is a chart showing my weekly progress, the speed bumps are last years holiday.

I don't follow the SW plan to the book, i never have. I think it's whatever works for you that matters. My plan is loosely based on SW plan, with a bit of my own ideas thrown in for good luck.

The later part of my year has been a deceleration in weight loss, and i am comfortable with that. I find the exercise i am doing is building muscle and changing my body shape for the better. This is something everyone should take into their consideration, as some weeks when you are active you may increase muscle mass and possibly put a little weight on. The body will feel firmer and look better though, so don't get down.

To summarize my year i would say that i have had a good start with a consistent middle and a expected tail to target. My lifestyle has changed for the better as a result of the SW influence. This is something everyone should embrace if they want results. Change the lifestyle change your weight for life.
Good luck if your on the plan, and believe in yourself.

P.S
I have decided to push on with another stone loss over the next few months. once i get to 15st i will stay put.....i think.

The tour de Brownhills with Garmin Verb Elite.

A ride around my home town.

I recently became the proud owner of a Garmin Verb Elite. This is a small camera device which is great for recording cycle rides, runs or anything else for that matter.

I will say that so far i have had loads of problems with the device, so much so that the first one had to go back to the seller.

The second device i had sent out to me has been trouble free so far. I had to purchase a second part to allow me to mount it on my handlebars. There is a mounting device that comes with the device which i feel is more suitable for mounting on a car dashboard.

Here are my video's please watch and enjoy.

Stage 1 of the tour de Brownhills.

Stage 2 of the tour de Brownhills.

Stage 3 of the tour de Brownhills.

If you like or not, please leave me some feedback.

Slimming world and my Mr slinky speech.

My Motivation to weight loss.

12 months ago if someone had said to me "if you lose 7 stone in weight, your penis will grow by 11 inches and you will become immensely Rich" i would have lost that 7 stones in four months.
if on the other hand they had said to me "if you Don't lose 7 stone in weight you will inevitably become subject to illnesses and probably suffer an early death" i would have said "pppfftt yer right"!
Its amazing how we become motivated by things that are purely material, and our health sits on the back burner.

Well earlier this year i realised that my health was on the line due to my weight problem! I weighed in at 23st12lb and inevitably i was suffering for it.

Too many times before i have thought "i will go on a diet and sort things out", but it didn't get much further than that. Lets say it was a token gesture, so that if some one mentioned weight problems i could say "yes, im on a diet". it would be an excuse for me to carry on necking bottles of wine and take away meals.  i would indulge in high fat fast food and convenience snacks while proclaiming that i was trying hard to lose weight.

Well that was not going to happen this time! I felt a steely determination flushing through my veins.  Finally the most important thing happened, i stopped making excuses. There was no more "well at least i am trying" rationalizations.

So at the very end of February i turned up at SW, not knowing exactly what to expect although i knew a lot about the diet and methods used. I was already one and a half stone down from my heaviest as i was doing the slimming world plan in my own fashion.

This was the first time i met my fellow sufferers, that is you lot. To say i was nervous was an understatement, though that fear was soon put to bed. You made me feel normal and at home to which i am eternally grateful.

From that day forwards i have stuck to my plan, it's not text book Slimming world, but it is built on their fundamentals.
I don't eat bread at all any more and i don't miss it. (not something sw recommend)
I avoid pastry at all costs and i don't miss it. (not something sw recommend)
Now i do miss the odd drop of alcohol, but it's a sacrifice that i have to make as i have a goal or even "a mountain to climb".

Throughout my life i have been on one of three levels of mind in relation to my weight.
1) I am unhappy with my weight and i am going to make a token effort to lose weight. (most of my life)
2) I am unhappy with my weight and i will do something about it every day of the rest of my life. (That's me now)
3) I am happy with my weight. (this only occurred when i was a new born, or when i am totally drunk out of my head or when i forgot how much of a lump i am or was!)

So there you have it, i am going to do something about it for the rest of my life, and as for the penis extension......well i will just have to make do with fruity Rivitas i suppose. (see reference below).

Fruity Rivita reference; One of our elder statesmen male members, one made a joke in group about how women like things long and hard like the stiff fruity rivitas. It took him a while to get over it.

If you like what i do and it helps motivate you, drop me a dollar, i can then make some more.

Brownhills on a cycle.

I have been improving my fitness  of late, with the aid of a little cycling.
Recently I posted the videos on Facebook for the benefit of those who no longer live in the area.
The video is set to rave music, to which I only listen to infrequently.
Well here you go, enjoy your tour of Brownhills West and Clayhanger.
Here part 1.
Here part 2.
Here part 3.

What is going on in the world?

What is going on in the world ?

The recent terrorists attacks in France are sure to give rise to further violence. The violence is no more likely to come from terrorist than vigilantes, such is the state of your average Joe's mind. 

People are brain washed then condition into acts of terrorism and violence from all sides of the spectrum. Jihadist are being recruited on the back of what they see as injustices against their brothers. Right wing racists then feed off the media reports delivering us daily depressing reports on terror attacks. Its an ever decreasing circle which is not going to have a happy ending.

There is a quotation doing the rounds at present that goes something like this. "Not all Muslims are terrorists, but all terrorists are Muslims". There is a smidgen of Truth in the quotation as there is certainly a high percentage of recent attacks coming from people of the Muslim faith. 

I am no politician,, and find it difficult to understand why the very small minority of Muslims would want to cause such bad feelings towards their faith? Is their final agenda an all out religion based world war?  This surely can not be their aim....can it?

Some one I know well said to me "all terrorists should be executed", which had me thinking we, (despite all the advances we have made in the last 2000 years) are no better of as a race. Many years ago those Roman soldiers that took a certain terrorist from Nazareth to his execution at Golgotha. After all Jesus himself was considered a terrorist by the Romans, was he not?
Come to think of it, that moment Jesus Christ was executed is the point at which modern religious wars were born. Eureka!!! I have it all worked out new, It's actually the birth of Christianity that is at fault for everything. Lets get off the average Muslims back then and give them a break.

Mr Sleek hey!

Yesterday, 6th November 2014 i won the "Mr Sleek award 2014 for Chasetown slimming world.

I was nominated against another of the male members Michael who is a bubbly, animated and popular group member. I consider Michael as being a friend, and a fellow sufferer. Michael is a very competent orator and gave a wonderful speech when he was nominate. Previously Michael had cracked a joke about ladies liking long, hard and crisp fruity Rivitas which went down well with the group.

As for the Ladies, there were numerous nominations. All worthy candidates in my opinion; as to be nominated is a endorsement of the effort and commitment one has made. Kim was the winner of the ladies event. She is a very determined and attractive young lady with a target in her mind that she has reached in good time. to you Kim i Doff my cap.

Here is the speech i made, which i was writing for this blogg anyway.



12 months ago if someone had said to me "if you lose 7 stone in weight, your penis will grow by 11 inches and you will become immensely Rich" i would have lost that 7 stones in four months.
if on the other hand they had said to me "if you Don't lose 7 stone in weight you will inevitably become subject to illnesses and probably suffer an early death" i would have said "pppfftt yer right"!
Its amazing how we become motivated by things that are purely material, and our health sits on the back burner.
Well earlier this year i realised that my health was on the line due to my weight problem! I weighed in at 23st12lb and inevitably i was suffering for it.
Too many times before i have thought "i will go on a diet and sort things out", but it didn't get much further than that. Lets say it was a token gesture, so that if some one mentioned weight problems i could say "yes, im on a diet". it would be an excuse for me to carry on necking bottles of wine and take away meals.  i would indulge in high fat fast food and convenience snacks while proclaiming that i was trying hard to lose weight.
Well that was not going to happen this time! I felt a steely determination flushing through my veins.  Finally the most important thing happened, i stopped making excuses. There was no more "well at least i am trying" rationalizations.
So at the very end of February i turned up at SW, not knowing exactly what to expect but knowing a lot about the diet and method used. I was already one and a half stone down from my heaviest as i was doing the diet in my own fashion.
This was the first time i met my fellow sufferers, that is you lot. To say i was nervous was an understatement, though that fear was soon put to bed. You made me feel normal and at home to which i am eternally grateful.
From that day forwards i have stuck to my plan, it's not text book Slimming world, but it is built on their fundamentals.
I don't eat bread at all any more and i don't miss it.
I avoid pastry at all costs and i don't miss it.
Now i do miss the odd drop of alcohol, but it's a sacrifice that i have to make as i have a goal or even "a mountain to climb".
throughout my life i have been on one of three levels of mind in relation to my weight.
1) i am unhappy with my weight and i am going to make a token effort to lose weight. (most of my life)
2) i am unhappy with my weight and i will do something about it every day of the rest of my life. (Thats me now)
3) i am happy with my weight. (this only occured when i was a new born, when i am totally drunk out of my head or when i forgot how much of a lump i am or was!)
so there you have it, i am going to do something about it for the rest of my life, and as for the penis extension......well i will just have to make do with fruity Rivitas i suppose.

Me, slimming world and a bike called Obera Aqua.

My name is Warren Parry, i am a 47 year old (overweight) male.
On the 5th January 2014 i weighed in at a hefty 23st 12lb............. here is the story of my road to recovery.

At a smidgen under 50 years young, i have turned my life around to a fuller healthier way of being.

Heres where my road began; it was another mundane shift at work, on a dark and dank day in January. The sort of day where not even a free lunch at the local taproom would raise one's spirits.  In fact the day was utterly unmemorable with the one exception which was the fatigue i suffered on my ascent to the building's third floor!

On arrival home that evening, i could not relax. The thought of my breathy, sweaty assent to the top of our office was eating away at me like a untended fresh cream eclair in the coolerbox. A glance over to the corner of our kitchen revealed those wretched scales, the ones i bought 5 years ago when i was a mere 19st 6lb. Would i dare to weigh myself? I pondered my dilemma, my imagination telling me the scales would say "one person at a time fatty". I  knew if i stepped on them i would be stimulated into a action plan.

The fortitude came to me as i gratuitously wolfed down a slice of toast soaked in butter.I approached the scales and blew away the cobwebs, firing a couple of expletives in the direction of said scales, as if to warn them to be good to me. To my horror the scales clocked up 23st 12lb. Bemused, i stepped off to checked them and to see if they were level. Picking the scales up i shook them (as men do with anything they think is not working). Bracing myself i mounted up again, quite sure they would be nearer to the 20st mark but no, 23st 12lb it was.

I sat beside my wife and broke the news, she looked over her glasses in a slightly nonplussed manner. I awaited her exclamation of surprise at how her leviathan of a man could be so overweight when he looked so fit? It didn't come, not even a "i didn't think you were that heavy". So i guess i was the only person who didn't quite see the fat bloke in our house.

My head was spinning for the next couple of days as to how i could easily address the problem. I thought exercise would be the key. That way i could eat loads of crap and still lose weight. Looking back, my addiction to high fat value foods had conditioned me into wanting more, no matter what the outcome. I was a fairly active person anyway,as i was taking lots of walks with the dogs. I soon realised that i would also have to amend my diet, overcoming my enslavement to fatty food. Over the years i had tried a few diets, with limited success. Having heard that the slimming world diet was a diet where you change your lifestyle, and still ate plenty of food i thought i would build my plan around that.

 Bizarrely the Sunday following my realization of how unfit and overweight i was, i decided to begin exercising by dancing in our front room to the Venga boys  (follow my leader). Looking back, i must have looked like a demented crystal meth abuser. My plan however was working; my loose interpretation of the Slimming world diet and the exercise helped me lose 3lb or so in the first week.

The following week my wife and i decided go for a long walk. We took the dogs to the beautiful Tissington trail and completed a 15 mile amble. Towards the end of the walk i began to get a sharp pain in my ribs, a bit like stitch as well as a pain in my back. The pain then occurred every time i went for a walk after that. A visit to the doctors ended with the usual answer from him being that he "thought it might be due to my weight problem". He referred me to a health advisor who in turn offered me a free 10 weeks at a weight loss club/group. I chose to go to Slimming world as i was already loosely following their ideals.

By the time i plucked up courage to drag my sorry carcass to a group, almost 6 weeks had passed. I was now 22st 6lb and to be honest i was not feeling much better for my efforts. The pain was still in my back and ribs, which was troubling me. The doctors referred me to a specialist who said it was muscular skeletal, and not my Gall bladder as was now suspected by the GP. It dawned on me that my injury coincided with my "Venga boys inspired" cavorting around activity. At least my mind was at rest now i knew it was a simple muscular injury.

The day for my initial weigh in was a bit of a nerve wracking affair. I had decided i would stay to the groups after the weigh in no matter how embarrassed i would be. The first visit to slimming world involves an induction where your consultant introduces themselves and gives you an insight into the slimming world way. You then weigh in at the end of the group. The assemblage were remarkably  friendly, led by a very bubbly consultant called "Joolz". The meeting was in fact nothing to worry about or even get slightly embarrassed about. There were another one or two men in the group who stayed behind, alongside about 20 ladies. Joolz was very positive, she spoke with authority, encouragement and when required some sympathy.

My weight loss from that point on was fairly constant thanks to the free and easy plan from SW. My losses were constantly between 2 and 5lb per week. The extra easy plan suited me, i was finding it quite unbelievable how much food i could eat, and still lose weight. Unfortunately not many weeks into my time at Joolz group, she decided to move home back to Wales and therefore leave the group leaderless. Slimming world appointed a interim group leader until a permanent one could be found. By now i was quite enjoying the after weigh in group sessions where much hilarity was to be had. It was quite worrying however that we were leaderless. I would say this was the only time i have considered leaving the group due to the uncertainty. It was nevertheless a undue worry as slimming world had soon appointed a new consultant.

The saviour who appeared in the form of an existing member was the Lovely Rachel. She was a regular group member, who had  the guts and mettle to take up the leadership of the Chasetown posse. Rachel, under the guidance of slimming world is now going from strength to strength as a consultant. Its not easy standing up and talking to a group of strangers, but she has taken to it very well.

Once i had reached 3.5 stone loss at slimming world i decided i should once again push myself to get fitter. I had been watching a few sites selling used bikes; I really fancied getting a racing bike.

I had soon committed to take the plunge and get myself the aforementioned road racing bike. I had no idea which type to get, as i had not done enough research in racing bikes. The last road  bike i had was when i was 14, and that was stolen by our paper-boy. The idiot tried to sell it at our local bike shop after he had stolen it from my mom's driveway; anyway that was called a BSA javelin, it was a bright yellow 5 speed bike. Now for some weird reason i had fixed pretensions of getting myself nice yellow road racing bike. Having little knowledge of which were good bikes and which were inferior bikes i began looking. My son had tried to bestow on me some useful tips on what i should look for. He gave me some crucial pointers and what specification were considered by cyclists as a reasonable one. I was amazed at the price of some of these bikes, some cost as much as my new car had. In the end i made a rush decision, and as it turns out good decision to purchase an Orbea Aqua. This was blue and white cycle, nothing like the yellow i had wished for. I picked my new bike up about a week before i was due to go abroad on holiday. The saddle on this bad boy looked narrow enough to fit between my buttocks and deposit itself deeply into my bowl, which was worrying.

I started by riding 2 or 3 miles a night and thinking i had achieved something immens. Well i had achieved something, i had actually begun to become fitter.Biking is not a cheap way to up your exercise levels, as the correct gear is very expensive I always thought that people wearing Lycra and riding bikes were pretty much weird, and to this day i stand by that, i still think they are weird, though i have a full wardrobe of it now myself.

My Orbea Aqua is a great piece of kit. Its a fairly modern road bike made in Spain by the good and knowledgable people from Orbea. They are not one of the colossal cycle manufacturing companies that are out there, but they are well respected and build good quality bikes. Losing weight is not achieved by use of leechcraft or magic beans; Its done by eating the correct food (with help from a dietitian if required), and a generous helping of exercise (body magic) if possible. My work out just happens to be flogging my guts out up a 10% gradient on my trusted stead. For all those that would like to lose the belly, i can assure you that the bike really does help. There are hundreds of manufacturers out there, it can get a little confusing if you want to buy one. I have included a link to Orbea web site here. All i can say is mine does what it says on the tin and thats all i have to say about that-Forest

Your slimming world consultant may be a motivator and a wealth of knowledge, they may well be always available for a pep talk, but it's you that needs to make the difference. Its you that needs to decide to take the stairs instead of the lift, or put the dog on the lead even though its raining and the x factor is on. It's these little things that make a hell of a difference....even if the dog don't want to go out in the rain. I have to confess that i had become a sluggard prior to slimming world. I thought that going for the occasional walk was enough, well it isn't, not even close.

One thing that i have struggled to come to terms with is using nutrition during stamina events At present, when i go for a ride of any distance i soon run out of fuel (i suddenly lose energy). I can actually feel almost the exact moment i lose energy. My worry is that once the stomach is empty while under exercise, the body will switch into emergency save mode. In this mode, the body is more likely to burn muscle than body fat (catabolise), This i feel is a primeval instinct and something built into our homosapien DNA. Unfortunately while these hominid homie instincts worked well for sapiens, they don't work well for me and i would think all other homies who are trying to lose body fat. Another problem is that once i run out of fuel my body craves food that contains the most or the fastest acting calories which take shape in the dreaded FATS and SUGARS, oh cruel world.

Well thats enough about exercising for now. This week i weighed in at 17st 1lb which equates to a loss of  6st 11lb. i am immensely proud of what i have done and thankful that i had great support from SW and the group i attend. By Christmass this year i would like to be 16st or vet very close to it.

Without SW, i will not achieve this target. Attendance will be 100% until i reach my target, i will then have a think about a way forwards.

If you are struggling with your SW diet plan, fear not. It's not the plan you are struggling with, it is in fact yourself where the struggle lies. Don't give up on your visits to the group, as this would be to give up on your happiness long term. Drag your ass to group, tell everyone where you are going wrong. It might feel like you are showing yourself as a failure, but this is not the case. You are in fact showing yourself as a strong person, who has the will to beat down the hunger devil we all posses. Who cares if you failed and ate crisps and chocolate? Well the person who cares most is you. Until your head is in the right place, you will continue to fail in your weight loss endeavours. The best place to sort the head out is with like minded people, so back to group with you!!! You will be a success if you want to.....no one can stop you.

Should anyone need some advice or even offer me advice, please feel free to post in the comments.

Please do not use this post as promotional literature without my prior permission.

Slimmers World......for men?

Slimming world for men.

Over the last 29 weeks i have been attending a Slimmers World (SW) group held about 3 miles from my home.
Over that period of time i have lost almost 5 stone in weight. Prior to that i had lost a further 1.5 stone which began in late January.

For the first 1.5 stone of weight loss i had loosely adhered to the SW plans that i had read about. The reason why i had not joined a SW group from the get go was a financial one. I had been offered a voucher by a health care professional who i contacted early in the year. Due to appointments this took me 7 weeks to get sorted.

The group i joined was a complete unknown to me at first. Now i know them, it's safe to say they are a fantastic bunch of people who recognise that they have a problem with their weight.

I put the members into three categories, all of which are to be commended for their efforts.
 1) Those determined to lose weight or maintain, they have a plan, stick to it and it works.
2) Those that would like to lose weight, and use SW as a stick to control themselves with. They need plenty of encouragement. Sometimes the plan can go wrong. This is usually corrected in quick order.
3) Those that have it in their minds to lose weight, the fact they go to SW is proof to others they are making the effort. Meaningful motivation is hard to come by, the plan often falls apart with unsatisfactory results.

I admire all three types as they are getting off their ass's to get things done.

Men at SW have the easy ride in my opinion. We are accepted in social circles with a little less shame and antipathy when we are overweight. We can easily laugh off any weight gains as being due to a heavy session on the booze or a family BBQ etc. And finally we find it easier to admit that we have had a week of being a "cake monster" or just not sticking to plan.

I doubt that men have it as hard throughout the weight loss process due to their disposition to hand childcare to the fairer sex. What i mean is that women tend to be the ships cook and cleaner in most households. Not only do they provide food for the family, they usually end up clearing the leftovers from the table. Now even me as a Neanderthal man has picked up that slice of toast the kids did not want and thought "seems a waste to put it in the bin"! Now the good lady of the house will encounter this temptation on more than one occasion every day, meanwhile the man of the house will be making a hasty retreat to his pipe and slippers.

i guess what i am trying to get at in this post is that men should not be afraid to head off to the local SW meeting and try to shed a few pounds, after all it's so much easier for us.

My slimmers world experience so far.

In January this year i decided that i was going to do something positive about my weight which was causing me a few health issues.

I had been to the doctors about an ongoing thyroid problem i had, the doctor said he could refer me to a nurse for help with my weight. The referral was for a health advisor, who would weigh me and send me off to either slimmer's world or weight watchers. My appointment with the nurse went as expected, with my weight coming in at the heaviest i had ever been........ I might put my weight down on here at some point.

The nurse asked if i wanted Weight Watchers (WW) or Slimmer’s World (SW)? I opted for SW; however i would have to wait five weeks before i could go to a group.

I had a good idea of how the SW diet worked; i simplified it to a low fat diet. I began the diet immediately in my own style shaped loosely around SW free and easy. I stayed on it for the next five weeks whilst i waited to go to group.

My wife was very supportive of me, she shopped in a way that the food in the cupboards and fridge were easy for me to use and prepare. She also took on board the low fat diet, though she did not need to lose a great deal of weight herself. 

The first four weeks went by in no time, with me averaging 4lb loss per week. I weighed myself every Saturday morning while no one was around...........when i look back i have no sound reason for this as I am not embarrassed. I mean i am not obsessed by my weight, after all it is just the way i am.

The fifth week came along, as did the butterflies. I had chosen a group local to me in Chasetown which took place on a Thursday evening. The time and day this group met were just what i needed, as weekends and day time groups would not work for me. On the Thursday evening i began getting a bit twitchy as i was feeling a little nervous.........”all those women, I hope there's some blokes there as well”! I weighed myself at home and to my amazement i had lost in total from the day i started some 20lbs. I do have to add here that, those first three weeks are hard to get your head into, however they are easy to shed that excess weight in my opinion.

Thursday evening came, i prepared a meal of beans poached eggs and SW chips for me and the wife. It has to be said that i think baked beans are the food of the gods, i can eat them cold and hot alike. At that time they went with at least one third of all the meals i prepare. 

My wife, who may have been inspired by me heading off like a brave little soldier, weighed herself and recorded her weight. She wished me luck then waved me off just like one of the kids about to embark on their first day at school.

The group met in the local Methodist church at 7.30pm. I was there for 7pm as requested, to have some kind of introduction meeting. I sat around a small table with a couple of other new members and listened to the wonderful "Joolz" telling me how things worked and reeling off too many good tips for my poor old brain to remember in one sitting. The lady sat immediately next to me, 'Sarah' said she had been to SW before and that in her opinion Body Magic was very important. Well too right she was, i endorse that opinion whole heartedly, now i have experience a couple of months of it.

The introduction takes about 30 minutes. At the end of the 30 minutes you are equipped with the SW bible, which contains recipes and syn values of all sorts of food. You are required to stay through the meeting that occurs after all are weighed. I had done this once at WW, and not enjoyed it. I sat down in the half moon of chairs with little expectation of anything remotely interesting happening. To my surprise I was thoroughly entertained for the whole time, at times laughing out loud. Joolz was both funny and informative with a useful dose of understanding. This was the point where I said to myself “you’re going to need this group going forwards stay whenever you can”. The people who stayed at group were both humble and magnanimous at their results. Some made jokes about their gains but you know what, they had stayed to face it which I comend. Others revelled in the glory of their loss and rightly so.

It was now my turn to weigh in, no embarrassment or sharp intake of breath from observers, it was all rather cordial. My weight was, as I expected or very close to it. I picked up my books etc and headed off into the distance.

I spent hours reading through the books, identifying food that was free, or super free that I actually looked forwards to eating; there was plenty of it I can tell you.

My wife from this point will be referred to as “Mi Julie” shopped accordingly when she next did a ‘big shop’. I had a decent loss the first week (loss by week listed below). I was amazed that I did not at any point feel hungry. One of my biggest decisions was to cut out bread entirely as it was inevitably going to be my Achilles heal I thought. I have stayed with this for 6 months now and do not miss bread at all. I do however feel (as I expect alcoholics do) one taste and I could end up a train wreck!

Mi Julie weighs in on the Thursday mornings; she has never attended a slimming club as she is in reasonably good shape most of the time.

The first week of going strict on the diet mi Julie had a 2lb weight loss and exclaimed “it can’t be correct as I have felt like I am over eating”! The weight has continued to come off her in small amounts to this day, she is now at an ideal body weight and needs to maintain from here on in.

The meetings were a joy to attend and somewhat inspirational. Joolz left the area and the group about 8 weeks into my membership. At the time I had torn my Achilles tendon and had a month or so in plaster unable to drive. My weigh in’s for four weeks were brief, in and out as I had to rely on lifts to the venue.

It was a joy to find out that the lovely Rachel (one of the group) had made the not insignificant decision to train as a consultant and take on the group.

It has been a pleasure having some one I knew taking over the group. She is enthusiastic funny and a good leader in my opinion, so all power to her in the future.

The group remains inspirational; it’s a fuel cell for my ambition of reaching a target I have stored in my head. I have become somewhat emotionally involved with the group to the extent that I find myself feeling their pain when they gain and their elation when they lose. I have a strange thing that runs through my head at the ‘weigh in’s’. I feel empathy for the people who are struggling with their weight! It angers me that people who fight hard to control their weight are made to feel stigmatised. It’s all because they carry a little more timber than your average super model. I want to say “you are beautiful; don’t let your weight be a source of sorrow or anguish, keep your head held high”.

I am naturally fat; well that’s my excuse anyway. I don’t care for people who form an opinion of me because I weigh more than them, nor should others. If you lose weight one week, well good on you, if you gain…..well I bet you had a good time doing it, and it will come off next week.

The best part of me losing weight at this present time is the friendships I have made. These friendships are with people I admire for their fortitude and courage in tackling a problem they see with their appearance.

Rachel is a cracking leader who would like to put her own stamp on the way she does things, which I think is fantastic. I hope in the future more people stay behind to the meeting no matter if they have gained or lost…. I nor anyone else for that matter form opinions of each other based on our gains or losses, we are all brilliant.

Weight loss weekly, ss = hold.

·        -4

·        -5

·        -3.5

·        -4

·        Ss

·        -8

·        -1.5

·        -1

·        -4

·        -2

·        -2

·        Ss

·        -0.5

·        -2

·        -4

·        -1

·        -4.5

·        -2

·        -5

Here is my food diary for week ending 10^th July.

Friday; Breakfast; Bowl mixed super free fruit + 200ml fat free Greek Yoghurt. 
Lunch; hand full of strawberries. 
Dinner; Green peppers, Mushrooms, Whole leafed spinach, slimmer’s world chips with stock cube, 4 Quorn sausages 2 syns 
Pudding; 20g special k granola (healthy extra b) pineapple chunks, 200g of fat free Greek yoghurt, sweetener. 

Saturday; Breakfast; Baked beans, tinned tomatoes, lean bacon, eggs x 2 Quorn sausage x 3 0.5 yns each. 
Lunch; White rice, chicken in tikka massala flavour. 
Dinner; Spices, tomato peseta, stock pot, whole potato's, spinach 1/3, onions, 3 Quorn sausages 0.5 syns each (curry). 
Pudding; 2 x Digestive biscuits, mixed fresh fruit and sweetener, Quark (cheesecake). 

Sunday; Breakfast; Bowl of mixed fruit and fat free Yoghurt 200ml. 
Lunch; Cold pasta, tomato, lean bacon pieces. 
Dinner; Beans, sw chips, vegetarian sausage. 
Pudding; none. 

Monday; Breakfast; Bowl of fruit with 200ml Greek fat free yoghurt. 
Lunch; Bowl of white rice and chicken pieces. 
Dinner; white rice, allowance of feta cheese, peppers, onions, sw chips, Quorn chicken slice. 

Tuesday; Breakfast; Bowl of fruit with 200ml Greek fat free yoghurt. 
Lunch; Apple Banana. 
Dinner; boiled potatoes, mixed veg, boiled chicken breast, roast potato's (air fryer, one cal) 
Pudding; Fresh Mango, fat free fromage 150ml, 25ml granola. 

Wednesday; Breakfast; Bowl of mixed berries with 200ml of fromage frais. 
Lunch; 
Dinner; Mixed salad, boiled egg, fat free cottage cheese healthy option feta, strawberries and a peach. 

Pudding; 25grm granola, chopped banana, blueberries topped with 200ml fat free yoghurt. 

Thursday; Breakfast: Bowl of mixed berries, 200ml of Greek fat free yoghurt. 
Lunch; few strawberries. 
Dinner; Basmati rice and vegetables with sw chips. 
Puddings; cheesecake, 2 digestives (low fat) raspberries and strawberries, fat free lemon quark.

There’s so much great energetic food you can have on the sw diet. i have put together a fun montage of such meals, please enjoy.

                           

The Tour de France experience ooh la la!

I watched with interest the Saturday morning news which featured a lot of coverage on the Tour de France in Yorkshire.
I have always liked cycling sports, and have watched every stage of the tour on TV some seasons. This year though my interest has been particularly piqued by the English Grand depart in York.
My wife is a keen observer of sport, i was however somewhat intrigued if she had any interest in the Tour.

On her return from work Saturday i proposed a walk with the dogs around a nice reservoir as a surprise on Sunday, the location would be a secret.
I spent the next three hours working out where to park, what time to arrive and where would be quiet enough for us to observe. The best place to view in my opinion was at the bottom of the climb up 'Cote de Midhopstones' not far from the end of Underbank reservoir.

The secret was fairly safe with me, though the good wife made a couple of attempts to find out what i was up to.
Later that evening i could not contain my self when i heard that the British favourite was out, due to a crash at the finish on a Saturday. As the news was read out i yelped "oh bloody hell" to which my wife asked why are you so interested in that? I then watched as the penny dropped, "are you planning to take me to watch that tomorrow"? she asked. At this point i came clean and said ? "yes, we should go and take a walk around Underbank reservoir with the dogs and then watch the race pass". "Ok" came the reply, "i am looking forwards to it".

Sunday morning arrived, we packed the car, and set off with the intention of arriving at about 9.30am before anyone else could get there.
It was a steady journey up the motorway and as scheduled we arrived in the village. it quickly became clear that there were already some considerable amount of people on their way to the race. Parking was at a premium, even though we parked a mile from the race road.

First sight of reservoir.

We walked for about 3/4 of a mile through the town and then down the side of the reservoir before reaching the outdoor activity centre.
The place was very busy selling tea, coffee and other refreshments, at what i have to say was a very reasonable price.

A young girl takes the leap of faith.

Children were playing on the leap of faith while campers took there tents down below.

Camp site at underbank outdoor centre.

We passed the outdoors centre after participating in a nice cup of coffee priced at only 80p. within half a mile we were bearing down on the road where the race was to pass. I didn't take me long to realise that space was going to be at a premium. The first sight of the road took me back a bit as a huge exploding falis had been painted red on the road.

Not a Banksy i am sure.

We decided to go to the bottom of the hill where the riders would turn off the main road to begin the climb. Here a narrow bridge was being manned by security staff and a single bobby. We found a pitch about 3ft wide at the end of the bridge. we could site here and rest our backs against the wall. we would also be only inches from the road.

The bobby, the wall and mi Julie.

Sitting against our wall on the bridge.

As we looked up the hill we could see the crowds growing. This was not going to be a quiet pitch like i had planned.

Looking up the hill.

When we looked to the road junction we noticed that the crowed there was growing too. we later found that a block of 20 toilets were sited here plus a disabled persons viewing area.

View to road junction.

The Mustard pot pub was very busy.

As soon as we took our place we noticed the high volume of people still coming into the area. Lots of cyclists were streaming through on their precision machines, glistening in the sun. We witnessed everything from scooters to tandems coming in to the area. I snapped as many of the bikes as i could, in fact i almost ran my battery out before the race came through. 

The excitement was beginning to build as more of the tour vehicles began to come through.

Lots of tour vehicles stream through hours before the race.

Lots of motorbikes.

The crowds were becoming quite noisy, cheering any vehicle that cam past. Police motorbikes came through every couple of the minutes. The officers on board were to the main getting into the spirit of things giving  high fives to the crowd. The Skoda team cars were beginning tome past with their multi tone horns sounding off which is a sound i associate with the tour de France.

Police scramblers, high five's to the crowds as they passed.

One of the wonderful bikes that came through.

Men women and children.

Young and old.

One of the joys of being there was to see the people. I really do enjoy people watching, especially when extrovert characters are  about.

Crowd pleaser.

This guy turned up and made us all smile.

Extremely new and expensive i would imagine.

Vintage bikes.

Fully kitted out.

Crazy Yorkshire man.

The lucky people who owned the property behind where we sat were having a tour de France garden party. The alcohol was flowing freely, as the day went on they got louder and louder. At one point they dispatched a messenger to call the crazy Yorkshire man over to join them. He was having non of it, insisting that they bring him some beer over. at the rear of the bridge we could see a huge camping site which i think was associated with the Mustard pot pub. Somewhere over there a brass band struck up adding to the atmosphere.

Camp site at rear of pub.

The time for the caravan to pass arrived. Vehicles began to come through with all sorts of sponsors logos plastered on them.Almost all had loud music blasting from their roof mounted speakers. Vans were coming through at a well rehearsed rate selling tour memorabilia. Some of the Yorkshire folk would run over thinking they were handing out free goodies, they would then come running back empty handed. Most were laughing shouting "don't they know their in Yorkshire"? One elderly chap shouted out "Trying to sell umbrellas in Yorkshire.....good luck with that".

Sponsors vehicle.

It was about 2.30pm when the security passed a message around saying that they were "going red". This meant that no one other than tour participants would be allowed on the roads. Still the tour vehicles came through with horns blasting. One of the spectators shouted out where the peloton was, some 10 minutes up the road. Helicopters began to appear overhead and more motorcycles sped through, including  French police.

Just before the action.

The roar from the crowd miles up the road could be heard, this made the hairs stand up on the back of my neck. The crowd standing on the bend then began to cheer, as the first participant sped through. No more than 5 seconds passed and the peloton shot through like a greyhound chasing the hare.

The peloton takes the bend at a pace.

Main body of peloton.

200 of the worlds best.

The spectacle of the main body shooting through in pursuit of the hare was inspiring, the cheering was loud and sincere with an electric atmosphere. Then as quick as you like......it was over......well almost. Some one on the bend shouted "theres more". The crowed roared again as a smaller second group shot through looking somewhat jaded. They were readily cheered all the way up the hill. Another roar cam from the bend some 15 minutes behind the peloton, it was the Yellow Jersey and he was blowing like a good un. Again the crowed roared them up the hill.

The leader of the race struggles up the hill, accompanied by a chaperone from his team.

The security guards then struggled to keep the spectators from the road as they assumed the race was finished for this section. Some guards were frantically trying to clear the road, word then passed through the crowed that a few stragglers were heading towards us. The crowed parted as 1.......2............3 more riders came through, they were roundly encouraged all the way up the hill. And that was it, the race was run for us.

We headed back towards the car, thoroughly entertained and impressed. I even had thoughts of getting myself a new bike, then i realised my age weight and other responsibilities. 

I have a refreshed sense of admiration for the guys who make their way into the Tour de France via their hard work and training. Its a truly great spectacle that i would recommend to anyone.